Is This What They Call A Zero Sum Game?

 

Up to 80 people were rescued after they were swept out to sea during a charity swim to raise cash for the RNLI.

All the swimmers had been taking part in a 3.8km charity race round Joss Bay, Broadstairs, Kent on Sunday.

He added: "When we got down there we found that there was a number of swimmers that had gone out, I understand the numbers are in the high upper tens.

"In the end through a search between two inshore lifeboats, rescue boats, and some paddle boarders which were part of the event, all people were brought ashore and accounted for.

No, I suppose one shouldn’t mock as they were doing it for perhaps one of the only worthwhile charities still out there.

However I am obliged to Watch manager Gordon Wise for adding a new phrase to my lexicon.

“I understand the numbers are in the high upper tens.”

I mean that is pure solid gold management speak.

PC:  Can you lend me some cash I’m a bit short?

Pal: Sure how much do you need?

PC: Something in the high upper tens should do.

PAL: WTF?

 

ref: Zero Sum Game – Wikipedia

I’m Not Following This Tax Malarky

I’m over at  Orphans of Liberty today 

NAZI RACOONS and GIANT TESTICLES

from The Register (ever eager for the main headline chance)

Amphibious Nazi raccoons menace Sweden

Hermann Göring's furry stormtroopers poised to strike

Sweden is bracing for an amphibious assault by a considerable force of raccoon dogs and raccoons, poised to cross the Öresund strait which separates the country from neighbouring Denmark.

Raccoon dogs (Nyctereutes procyonoides) are native to east Asia, where their populations are actually declining, but they have made themselves right at home across Scandinavia and continental Europe. Raccoons (Procyon lotor) are native to North America.

The raccoon dog was introduced into Latvia in the 1940s, and rapidly invaded neighbouring countries, penetrating as far south as Italy.

Two breeding pairs of raccoons were released outside Kassel, Germany, in 1934, with the authorisation of Hermann Göring's Reich Forestry Office, with spectacular results.

Hmm ‘Racoon Dog ‘  That would be the Tanuki  as he is known in Japan, well known for his unfeasibly large testicles.

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I wonder how

"Tan-tan-tanuki's testicles,
there isn't even any wind
but still go swing-swing-swing."

Translates into Swedish.

I didn’t mention in my original piece , But the Tanuki has its own onomatopoeia ‘Ponpoko’

This is the sound supposedly made by the Tanuki using its testicles as a drum. I was told but never had occasion to use it, that you can use it in conversation if you believe the person is talking bollocks.

Man 1: I believe David Cameron and the government have things under control now and I expect things to get better very soon.

Man 2: Oh ponpoko

The Importance of Being Idle

This conversation occurred after waiting 2 weeks for him to fix the water pump he broke whilst putting it on the ramp for the MOT. I noticed that the car kept cutting out when coming to a stop at traffic lights etc.

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It Was Always ‘Wrong’!

Full story: The Daily Mail

For sure there are many things wrong with the MSN in this country, not least the obsession with ‘Celebrity’ or to fully report on our depredations by the ‘great and good’ , their continued enslavement to the political class. But if I started listing them, I'd be here all day and into Monday.

But this particular one has raised my dander for years. How can a robbery or burglary ‘go wrong’ when the initial act was in itself ‘wrong’

A stunt can ‘go wrong’ a prank can ‘go wrong’ even a plan can ‘go wrong’ . but surely if that original plan was commit an illegal act, a ‘wrong’ act it cannot ‘go wrong’.

Do you ever read ‘A householder was devastated after a burglary on his house went right’.? No you don’t. Yet to me by implication by saying  ‘she was killed in a robbery or burglary that went wrong’ Is to say that it would have been OK apart from the fact that someone was killed.

“Oh pish and tosh Pavlov’s Cat” I hear you say “That’s not the point at all and you know it, you are just arguing semantics for the sake of it. Everybody knows that burglary and robbery are wrong”

Do they? Have you been reading the same things I’ve been reading in the last 2 weeks, because I'm afraid that it seems that not everybody does know that.

We have come to accept in this country as a matter of course a low level criminality as an occupational hazard and this is wrong. The reasons for it are myriad and I’m not going to start going into them now.

Whilst I am sure that the Oxygen thief that carried out this act did not intend for anybody to be killed, killed they were, in fact all because they decided to commit an illegal act. If they had decided not to ‘do wrong’ in the first place Judith Richardson would still be alive.

To my mind describing the brutal murder* of a pensioner as something that has merely ‘gone wrong’ is both a symptom and a cause and also an  insult to the victim.

 

 

*I say murder as to my mind that is what it is, however as we know, murder is very hard to prove in our courts, so it will probably be reduced to manslaughter and maybe not even that.

An Unfortunate Number?

Sometimes a number conjures up associations and thoughts that perhaps the writer never intended.

But may be that's just me, being a cynical old fart and slightly mad.

I Am Not Surprised

 

Japanese shame British looters with their honesty by returning £50 million found in quake rubble to tsunami victims

Japan has shamed Britain with its honesty in the aftermath of the earthquake and tsunami that brought the country to its knees.

While Britain’s courts are clogged with the steady stream of thieves and looters following last week’s riots, it emerged yesterday that the Japanese returned almost £50 million in cash found in the quake rubble.

In the five months since the disaster struck, people have turned in thousands of wallets and purses found in the debris, containing nearly £30 million in cash.

Also seen in Japan Today

Why am I not surprised?

What? didn’t you read my post on “Why Is There No Looting In Japan?”  or any of the other Japan posts Shame on you.

O’Torii, Miyajima

BWAHAHAHAHA!

Swindon switches street lights back on to boost safety

Hundreds of street lights in Swindon which were switched off to save money are being turned back on to boost safety

Council officials say energy-saving plans on 11 streets were revised as the roads were considered too dark.

 

I’m crying here, honestly there are real tears,  6 weeks into a 12 month trial  and this is at the lightest time of the year. BWAHAHAHAHA

No English Category?

click image to vote

Yes it the time of year for the Total Politics Blog awards, I went over to vote for a few of the good people who read this blog, I would vote for all, but there weren’t enough spaces.

Apart from the usual media whores, some people do deserve recognition for opening my eyes to stuff and also providing me with a good laugh.

And yet once again when it comes to selecting ‘Categories’ there is not one for English blogs and there are many out there. Yet you can get voted for by just being in Scotland when you write your blog, but not for actually living in England. and writing.

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Where for instance would I put the excellent Bexley is Bonkers , very local, very specific, very English. I suppose I could put it in Non-aligned, but I feel it doesn’t do it justice.

Although I suppose given the years of the denigration of Englishness. By that way of thinking any blog that would declare itself English automatically goes into the ‘Right Wing’ category.

Serving Suggestion

A Kent man found 37 guinea pigs dumped in his back garden on his return from holiday.

Click for bigger

This is not me, this is an Australian named Matt somewhere in Darkest Peru. As we all know Australians will eat anything provided you wipe its arse and walk it past the grill (sometimes even skipping the first step).

His verdict “ Crunchy and tastes a bit like chicken.” 

Let Us Sit Upon The Carpet And Tell Sad Stories

I’m still around in case you were wondering.

I spent last Friday to Wednesday acting as de-facto carer for my Grandmother, as the hospital turfed her out on the Friday bed clearing exercise and her [Don’t] Care Manager flat out lied to me that everything was in place for her to return home. (It wasn’t, hence my sojourn in Orpington)

So I was without internets for possibly the most exciting 4 days of the year and in any case I can’t add to all the millions of words that have already been written about the so called ‘riots’ ( Am I the only one annoyed they are described as ‘riots’ when they were just robberies with violence over a wide area).

The rest of the time has been spent applying for the available jobs out there, most of which due either to age or far too much experience I won’t even get a response from.

That being the case, everything I’ve tried to write has, to me, turned out self pitying and whiney, so not wishing to subject you to that, I’d rather remain silent, read my FeedDemon blog reader and comment where I can. Oh, and play Hash Tag games on Twitter.

I met a Koala once

Sometimes I feel like throwing my hands up in the air

Sometimes I feel like saying "Lord I just don't care"

And then sometimes I just feel like this.

Squeeze Till The Pips Squeak

 

Westminster axes Sunday free parking

Free on-street parking in the evenings and on Sundays is to be scrapped across the West End.Westminster Tories voted to press ahead with charges to boost the council's £49 million annual parking income by up to £7 million a year.

Can some one explain to me, how in the name of Jebus this is supposed to help anybody, except the local council.

Surely as we continue to struggle out of recession, they should be encouraging more people to vsit the West End, go see a show, go to dinner. Not actively discouraging them.

Not everybody wants to get the Last Train home with Stabby McStab, Drunky McDrunk and Little Miss Sweary.

In any case my last train from town is 23:38, doesn’t give much time for lingering over a fine brandy and a Monte Cristo (pre July 2007). I could get  a cab I suppose, but then add £30 plus to the night out (and in any case I live Sarf of the river)

This really does beggar belief.